2 months

I have been working as RPN for 2 months... and the feeling being a nurse is nerve wrecking for me. I am working as a part time Permanent Relief RPN in the hospital. Staffing owns me..they send me everywhere when i am needed to cover the regular nurses on the unit to book off.

The hospital i work at has 8 different units- Behavioural units (3 units) Palliative (2 units) Complex Care (2 units) and Rehab unit. Every unit has their very own routine of doing things... and each shift of each unit again has their very own routine.
Certain units , the regular nurses do not like we relief nurses..due to they are afraid we cannot perform to their standards due to we are relief.

As a new graduate and new hired...it is very overwhelming for me every single time i am send to different floor to work. Every day going to work is a suspense ..not knowing where u r going..and how are your patients like. Furthermore...nurses there..not all are friendly to help you.

I am desperate to apply for a permanent line in one unit..where i can find my routine..and get to know my patients and plan my care for them. I really wish i can get a line in Behavioural units...that's my passion..working with ppl with mentally challenge behaviour.

my baby has grown up

This morning I send Ryan to day care...it was drizzling but Ryan has his very own Spiderman umbrella and i have my very own cheap umbrella from dollarama.
He no longer need mummy holding hands for security..he can walk by himself without fear..and when crossing roads he knows how to look left, right and left again..before crossing..without me prompting him to do that.

When we reach the daycare centre..he walked in by himself..and say goodbye to me ..without the need of me following him into the centre.
Oh boy..at that time..it just hit me that he had grown so much... i still remember the first day i sent ryan to day care...he cried and cried..holding my hands not wanting to let go..
My boy has grown so much..and fast..
I am so proud of him..

I guess..by another few years..he will have his own friends to play with..and don't need this old mommy to tag along.
Time really fly fast...he is 5 ++ years old..going to be 6.
Meaning this old mummy is getting old too ..hehehe

Long time...

Wow..it has been awhile i have not blog. I am just busy and lazy lately. I am doing my pre-graduation training...meaning working full time for free.. till April 30th. Is a mixture of day shifts and evening shifts...but mostly day shift.
I am working at this Behavioural Unit in one of Hamilton small hospital. I love this place..and my preceptor (the nurse who trained me) is an amazing preceptor. She is a total doll!
She taught me alot and i have learned alot.
My patients are mostly alzheimers & dementia..but they are some with schizophrenias and bipolar.
There is this patient, N.R., she suffered from alzheimers and bipolars...she can talk..but it does not make sense..every time when i am giving her care..she will said "leave me alone... u asshole" or "leave me alone ...u son of a bitch.." but i did not take it personally..coz i know they are sick...
Daily i care for them without fail...i like to go to work..and i like to care for them..
I dunno why...i find that..with psychiatry patients..they are interesting and challenging.
Giving them meds is another challenge..the nurses there have to be creative...
and our critical thinking box is on 100% all the time..when we are at shifts.

However, some nurses dislike that unit..they said is like babysitting...pschiatry patients are not patients at all..or pschiatry nursing..is not nursing.
I totally disagree...coz brain is part of the human body and organ..it will fail too..and it is the most complex organ in the body.

I personally love psychiatry... coz..to me..is a big satisfaction when i care for them...it gives me the opportunity to assess their brain..their behaviour..and this task is not easy.
is not like biology knowledge we learn with other parts of the body..
coz brain..is hard to understand.

My ambition is to further career in psychiatry nursing.. hope that will happen :)

long week...

This week is pretty tough for everyone of us due to Kit is adjusting himself at his new job in Mississauga...he seems overwhelm due to different technology and systems he has to learn.
Ryan is officially starting school...he seems alright and happy about it. However, my concern is his health..due to he has to wake up early ...only having a bottle of milk..and then ..kit has to send him to day care at 7 am. Usually the day care will provide breakfast..but my mind will not at peace without actually seeing with my own eyes that my baby is eating...there is a certain percentage that Ryan is not eating..depending on what they are serving.
If i feed him from home..it will be too early...i already having troubles..asking him to drink his milk.
His school starts at 9 am till 3.30 pm.....we send him to day care at 7 am..so basically he is having a full day like us!
I really feel sorrie for Ryan..but we have no choice.
Monday went well for him...i picked him up straight from day care right after my class finished at 3 pm...
Gosh..it was hectic for me..due to..monday i have 8 am class...till 3 pm..then rush to his day care...pick him up..come back...give him milk first...then start cooking ..
it was boom.. boomm...boom...and i still need to work on my studies after i settle everything.
BOy..i am exhausted..even now.. still am...today Ryan is off from school..coz his schedule is alternate schooling days.
Therefore..i stayed at the library till about 6 this evening..to finish off my studying and homework.
My brain is shutting down now... i want to sleep..but too much stuff to do..

My assignments and exams are coming soon..every one of them are piling up...just waiting for me...
back to old schedules..man..i am so lazy after the break..it is hard for me to switch back.
Is like running old systems now eh...so slow...brain not functioning..hehehe

I hope next week will be better...really hoping!

Assertiveness

On Wednesday, we learned assertiveness behaviour in our professional development class. Coming from Asian background...we are trainned to be passive and submissive to everyone who is in authority.

Now, how to say NO to your boss or senior colleague or even your Mother IN Law? hehehe... i find that class very meaningful especially for me because i can see me being submissive and passive when i start my nursing career.

I had a great experience ..such as conflict with MIL ...my mother in law's background is she perceive that she is always right about everything. She won't accept my ideas or ways of doing things... or confrontation or criticism.
Is hard for me..because... I really do not wish to creat wars in the family...especially Ryan is in the house.

How I wish...my MIL understands english...so that i can express and explain to her clearly.
Seriously..if she understands english or i speak mandarin..i think things will be better.

Oh well... we really have to be assertive..as in..getting our needs met but without jeopardizing the relationship with whoever u r dealing with it.

no more smurf suit

I won't be wearing my baby blue colour (smurf's suit according to my pschy instructor) scrub or uniform to clinical this rotation. How sweet! We have to wear business casual apparel.

It was funny how my instructor tell us about the dresscode when one of the student asked him..

Intructor: About the dresscode, to me..it has to be the 3 B's rules...

Students: 3 B's?

Instructor: yes..no showing of boobies, buts and belly!

hehehe..trust me..the way he said it...cracks us up good eh...

He always came up a lot of good jokes...we felt very comfortable with him...he gave us no stress..and as long as we do our work and hand in on time..
we will sail through the course! :)

tiring week...

This week has been very tiring so far for me due to my long hours spent in college. I was up at 6 am every day...and reach college at 8 am... and stayed till 5 pm. Not that my class finished that late ..is just i am trying to adjust back to my crazy schedules process.

I used to stay in the library from 8 am till 10 pm..yea..basically library is my second home :)
This week...i could not do it..i am not used to it yet..but i am pretty sure by next week or 2..i will be able to switch it back.

So far, my first rotation of my 3rd semester is pretty easy for me.. I am dealing with mental health ppl..especially schizophrenia ppl.
I'll be visiting my clinical placement this Friday..and i am very excited and anxious at the same time.

Alot of ppl does not like mental health field..but i find it interesting. My instructor is a male instructor..and he has been a psych nurse for 23 years..and we love him! He is damn funny..and very unlike the normal nurses instructor.

I really respect him for what he has achieved and for what he is doing now.
He makes me want to further my studies in psychiatry field...maybe forensic!! hehehehehe
maybe..?

over did it

Ryan has over played for the pass days..he had a blast on Saturday..and on Wednesday he went for a school trip..another full day for him.

Consequences of all those fun- SICK! Yup..he was down with cold yesterday nite and this morning a mild fever.
I was up all night looking after him..poor baby couldn't get any sleep due to stuffy nose. He didn't cry at all..instead forced himself to sleep. Such a good boy i have here..if for me..i definitely throw a fuss already!

He woke in the morning with 37.4 Celsius, a slight fever..i was worried at that time..due to his febrile seizure history. I kept his temp down with ice pack and tylenol fever.
THank God by 10 am..his fever is down..back to normal temp...and he didn't take his nap at all till about 2 pm.

I am like a zombie now..with a headache..my head felt so heavy and i felt like wanna throw up...
I have been feeling like this all day..but i still have to watch Ryan.
I didn't cook dinner for everyone except i cooked porridge for Ryan.
I am not in the position to cook dinner feast for everyone!

I need help myself too..i am waiting for KIt to come home now so that he can take over my place...
I need good nite sleep tonite..badly!

2 more weeks

Time really flies eh... I left 2 more weeks of break then I have to go back to my crazy schedule life.
I really miss my crazy life these 3 months break. My brain getting lazy and rusty too.
I just got some of my books and i started to look at it..boy..i think i am getting very very busy and crazy this coming semester.
I will be dealing Mental Health clients as well as medications field again.
I hope everything goes well.. This time I will not have any Biology stress ...but will have Nursing Professional Ethics stress instead.

What I am going to miss when September comes is Ryan and Kit... I am going miss spending quality time with them..esp my Ryan. Every fun always have to come to an end..
Ryan will be going to Junior Kindy as well...and he is starting full day school every other day too.
Is going to be tough for him..I just pray that he will be alright and able to adjust to the routine.
Importantly, he won't get sick this coming winter time...

Promoted

Yup i got upgraded from G2 license to G license..wohooooooooooooooooooooooooo! I passed my freeway driving test..FINALLY!

Gosh i was so worried and scared for the whole month..i tell ya! Didn't really had good sleep for weeks.
U can tell by my "panda eyes"

Anyway, I am so very glad that everything is over now..and I am ready to go back to school now!

Thanks everyone for praying for me! MMMMMMMMMMMUAks

Thanks Facebook

What a great surprise.. Facebook.com has re-united me and my long lost friends..from primary school.
Facebook is really good...u can search anyone in the world..that u have lost contact and get back in touch.

Lenny and Susan...is great to get back in touch with u guys!

Aug 14th

This day is big for me...as this day is my highway driving test or freeway driving test they call it over here.

9.30 am is my test..and i am very nervous about it. I have not been driving for a year since I got my G2 license last year except for the driving lessons i got recently.
Its been rusty...and plus the test that i failed 3 weeks ago...gave me phobia.

If i fail this time..i have to re-do everything..from writing test to going through G1 again.
I hate the system here...why do they require 2 road driving test!
It is wasting time and money!

I left few weeks of break b4 i go back to school in Sept 5th.
Don't know what to expect here.... more challenging assignments to come...

What's up, Weather?

What's up with the weather? Is almost June, I am freezing cold here. Is 12 degrees Celsius now. I still need to wear my winter jacket when i go out. Is it me or the weather?

I don't know.. i am so afraid of cold nowadays. I used to be superwoman wearing t-shirt only..but now..i need layers and layers of clothing and socks too!
Or maybe i am sick? nah...i am getting old..kekekeke..

No more superchick here anymore.. hehehe just an old hen here... ;)

5 years of anniversary

Yesterday was our 5th wedding anniversary. Omigosh, time really flew by eh...coz I don't really feel it was 5 years. Ryan is turning 4 in January. We didn't get to do anything due to the weather was super cold plus Ryan still have his fever.
Just another normal peaceful day for us. I didn't go for class on Thursday and Friday because I have to look after Ryan.
He is much better today..but I have tons of assignment to finish.

Just finished one and lots more to go.. :)
Thank God is weekend..so that i have time to catch up a bit :)
Kit has been a Gem to me ever since i started school... he helped a lot with house chores and taking care of Ryan.

Today he cooked and wash all the dishes...and of coz bathed Ryan for me. I am thankful and grateful for that!
Very Blessed!

Extremely exhausted!

I am extremely tired this week due to lack of sleep for the past week. Past days i only had 4 hours sleep. Pretty bad because i need to get up early for my clinical. Today, my brain did not function very well. I got confused with the dates and days..and my resident who has some short term memory problem can remember today's day!
What a bummer!

Anyway, i survive through one of the test that i took on monday! PHEWWWWW... didn't do well though..managed to get B- ...
I am happy with it...coz i didn't get to study at all due to Ryan and Kit were sick during the weekends.

Just now Ryan had a slight fever...which freak me out! Gave him tylenol... and this means i won't get any sleep at all tonite. I have to monitor him closely due to his episodes of febrile seizure.
Welcome to motherhood!

I am thankful and grateful coz He is very kind generous to me... Without His blessings and love,
I don't think i can still hang in there..hehhehe.. Praise you LORD!

Bronchitis

Yup! Kit and I developed bronchitis ...thanks to me! I have been coughing for non-stop for almost a month already. Didn't get to see doc due to my lovely schedules...
anyway..Kit started to have fever, chronic cough on Thursday ..n today his fever didn't go away..that's what makes us go to walk in clinic today.

The whole situation is not really good! I just finished one test and one assignment on Friday and i have 2 tests on Monday which i am not prepare yet. On top of all that Kit is sick, Ryan is not feeling well too. Myself..as usual..hanging there..even though i am sick..i have to act i am not..
This is no good at all.
Sometimes i wonder whether i should continue my program or not..hmmm.. i am not sure..
Coz this program work load is taking ppl's life away...
many students already quit due to cannot cope with the stress.

Me? I dunno... i wanted to go on..but seeing Ryan and my family down..i am not very happy with it.
I hate it when things like this happened...I wish..i am the only one who get sick..i will take all the sickness...n not Ryan or Kit.

Today i have to do everything, taking care of my 2 babies, the house chores plus worrying how am i going to study for my 2 tests on monday!
I know HE is with me all the way...if is not for HIM ..i don't think i can still stay strong...

Ryan getting better

After 3 days of fever and cold, Ryan is getting much better today. All of us were so stressful because of him getting sick.
I am grateful and thankful to MIL that she stay home to take care of Ryan for me so that i can attend my class and take my tests.

He is up running around like usual and singing all the time too. I am so glad to see that again.
As for me, I am still have a bad cough and i have lost my voice. I couldn't talk and felt so tired due to medication.
I hope i will be much better before i start my clinical days.

my turn

Yup, i say it and i have it! Is my turn now to have the bug. I am down with a cold and sore throat.
I just finished my assignment, which i don't really know what i was doing.

I did my skill test no. 1 today...which i passed with not so good comment from the lecturer.
I was not very focus today. I think my body system is wearing out slowly.

Hate it! I really hope I have extra strength to do everything.

Being bad..

I felt so sorry for neglecting my blog and blog friends. I did not have any chance to visit any of my friends blogs at all ever since i started school.
My bad..totally my bad!

I really want to apologize.. I do not do it on purpose..is just that I do not have time. Now, u guys must be thinking, why i have time to update my blog and do sponsored post but not visiting u guys. Well, I have to do it in order to earn some money.
Seriously, now my brain is not functioning well, coz i do not have enough sleep lately.
Been getting up early and sleep late and on top of everything... i have stress over my exams and homework.

I broke down and cried like a baby on wednesday due to my overloading school work. I am lucky in the sense that I have Kit and Ryan to support me.
When i cried that day, Ryan said : Mommy, mou hum la... (don't cry la) and give me a tissue to wipe my tears...
he even said..Ryan is here..is okei...
My heart melted and felt so foolish...and weak.

I am not just complaining here...honestly the load is very heavy...never encountered so stressful education life b4.
I know HE is with me all the way! I know i can do it :)

I am back...

I am back..i have abandoned my blog for days. I am so swamped with school work. A lot of readings and assignments to do. Practically every week I have assignments due.
First semester, I am loaded with 6 subjects : Psychology, Biology, Professional Development, Practicum (Nursing Experiences), Practical Nursing Theory, and Communications.
Monday till Friday, whenever I come back from home, I have to rush to prepare for tomorrow's work.

I know I know..i am complaining..but I am just so grateful that I don't have to work part-time like other students because that will be very hard on me if I do that.
I still have my weekends to summarize everything for the week.
I am getting there, as in getting used to the routine and everything.

Poor Ryan has to get up early but he had his fun with mixing around with other kids. He has learned a lot of activities especially songs and speaking more English.

Overall, I am okie... :)