Thursday, December 01, 2005

how to be good parent?

Today Ryan has been very misbehaving. He purposely spilled his left over milk on the sofa and and the floor.... this is not the first time he did that. It has been lotsa times already. For the first few times i told him not to that and explain to him why he cannot do that.. but still he repeated it again and again.
TOday it got me soo mad coz the sofabed cover is a denim cover and rite now is winter time is very hard to wash and dry it. So, i exploded and scolded him and i even hit his hand. For that moment i didn't think rational that he will understand why i was scolding him and hitting him. But after doing that..i felt so badd and felt like a lousy mother.
After awhile..i talked to him and tell him why i scold him and hit him. It appears that he listened to me and he kinda felt sorrie for what he had done. I am not sure he really feels that or not...but the way his looks portrays to me..i am guessing he is getting it.

After few hours....it was time for bath. RIte after i bathed him ...he played the lotion on the table . He squeezed all the lotion on the table.
Again..i lost myself. I was soo tired with all the chores and he added more stuff for me to do. I know kids doesn't understand how tired we are n etc...but i really snaped out!
Again i scolded him ...and he looked soo shocked and sad.
It hurts me alot whenever i scolded him.
Deep inside my heart i know i should have explained to him first... but when actual fact happened..i couldn't control myself.

I really feel bad and didn't do a good job as a mother :(
I am praying hard that i will change myself and control my temper. :(
I hope i wouldn't repeat this again and raise Ryan in a healthy and positive way.

5 comments:

letti said...

aw..i'm sure you're a WONDERFUL FANTASTIC mom who tries her bestest. I suppose children go through phases. Love your snow pictures! Oh...and my sister Joanna (CY's WIFE ) is pregnant with her second baby!!!!!!! wooohoooo

geetha said...

Sometimes, we just can't help it. I explode too.. especially when Champion hits Mr. President.. (out of jealousy), when he purposely turns his plate upside down when he has had enough, drops whatever he is eating when he sees something else more interesting... I constantly remind myself, CALM DOWN.. nah, doesn't work always.. Sometimes, I just sit there, tell daddy to handle him, as he is more patient with kids..

Suprising, sometimes, Champion understands, and sometimes he just doesn't care.. I guess coz' he's just a kid..

I think it takes time.. they will eventually learn. AND they will also try to get into ur nerves..

We can't hold back ourselves sometimes hah! Me too.. especially after work, when we have to face these stuffs.. hmmpphhh! I do regret in things I do to.. I just pray to God, to help me.. I need HIS help here!

don't worry.. we will be able to control ourselves. Sometimes, we need time to learn too...

Gene Lim said...

letti: Thanks gal! COngratulations to u Joanna & CY...whooohooo! second one coming huh? Hey whaat abt u letti? any plans? hehehe


Geetha: yea gal! u r rite!..hehee Kit is more patient than i am too..hehee hope everything will better soon! i guess this is motherhood huh...

letti said...

hehe..we're gonna take it slow and easy (not toooo slow coz my "clock" is ticking ticking ticking.. ) but hey girl, you're doing excellent. *hugs*

G said...

Hi Gene, stumbled upon your blog. Read all your archives, thanks for sharing your experience there, nice to read about life on real people ... you know those who are not spoon fed by wealthy parents/in laws overseas. Happy 3rd wed anniversary and may the new year bring you lots of happiness and a great job! Merry Christmas and God Bless.